SELF-CARE 101
In my last blog post, I talked about stress and the importance of self-care. Since we're celebrating Self-Care September, I figured we could go a little into Self-Care 101, for those of us who need a reminder! Don't feel bad if that's you. Sometimes, we get so swept up in life, that we forget. Sometimes, we chose to put all of our responsibilities before ourselves. Some of us may have never known what self-care looks like because we'd never seen it modelled for us. I know I didn't have a clear idea of what self-care looked like until recently. My mom, bless her heart, modelled the "Work, stress, struggle, guilt" cycle, and it took a LOT of work to rewire my brain, once I realized I was living that learned pattern. No matter the reasons for neglecting our self-care, here are some little ways to take better care of yourself.
Physically
Get some sleep! Even if it means the floor isn't getting swept, sometimes, you have to chose sleep over other things, and that's ok.
Eat food that makes you feel good. I don't mean the indulgent stuff that you eat because it'll "make you feel better" or because "you deserve it". I mean, eat some greens. Get a smoothie. Get good nutrients into your body. Take a break from inflammatory foods. You'd be amazed at how much better you feel.
Stretch. That's easy. You literally have zero excuses for this one. Stretch while you're making coffee or brushing your teeth.
Take a still minute to tune in to what your body is telling you. It sends us messages all day long, but we're usually too busy "mind over matter-ing" that we don't listen to it's cues and signals. At the end of each day, right before you drift off, do a scan of your whole body, noticing where there's pain, discomfort, flutters of energy, etc. If you have reoccurring pain in a location, consider DOING something about it! Thank your body for all it does for you before you fall asleep.
Emotionally
Feel. Experiencing a lot of intense emotions? That's ok! It's how you handle those emotions that dictates your experience. When a feeling arises, sit in it for a minute. Let it be there, without judgement. Let it flow, then let it go. If it's not a good feeling, ask yourself where it's coming from. Do you have a need not being met? Has somebody hurt your feelings? Is it even your emotion, or have you picked it up from somebody around you? Negativity spreads, and empaths especially pick up on others emotions. I know my life changed drastically when I realized that I was an empath and then started to ask if an emotion was mine when a "negative" one came up. I was being a sponge for other people's feelings, and when I was able to identify that, I was able to be relatively unaffected by others' bad days. Also, we tend to call anger or sadness or grief "negative" emotions. But, they aren't. They are there to serve a purpose, if we let them. They are communicating with us, if we allow ourselves to feel them and don't try to suppress them. Calling them negative is just a judgment that we assign them. If we allow them to be felt without judgement, we can learn the lesson they have for us. For example, stress was telling me that I needed to create more support in my life. Resentment was telling me that I needed to speak up and express my needs so that the COULD be met instead of being upset that they weren't being met, automatically.
Journal. A great place to work out what you're feeling and why is in the pages of a journal. Don't put expectations on yourself to write an eloquent journal entry everyday. Start by writing down the emotions you felt throughout the day and track them to their source. That will give you a clearer idea of the things you need to work on or communicate with yourself and others. ALWAYS follow these entries with a gratitude practice. Simply write down 3-5 things that you're grateful for. You'd be amazed at how quickly this journaling combo can increase your self-awareness and outlook on life!
Breath. Any time an emotion becomes too big, pause. BREATH!!! Take as many deep breaths as it takes for you to not throw your Rae Dunn mug at the wall, flick off the rude driver that cut you off, or want to throw your whining toddler out of a window (I kid... kinda).
Cry. If you feel the need, by all means, DO IT! Crying is a wonderful way to let trapped emotions exit your body! If you let those emotions or energy stay buried away in there, they will eventually manifest in physical form, and it those are heavier emotions, they won't manifest in a pretty way. Let them OUUUT! Angry? Let out a scream! You'll feel better.
Mentally
Read. Even if it's just 5-10 minutes in bed, read something good for your brain. Reading isn't your thing? Audible. Listen to books. I recommend "You Are A Badass" by Jenn Sincero for starters.
Mind food. Podcasts, yo! Youtube vidoes! Free content from coaches. You can find this material all over the internet, and you can always make time for it, because you can listen to it in the car or while you put the laundry away. I really love Manifestation Babe, Mindlove, and Warrior Women with a Purpose for great podcast brain food.
Positive affirmations. If you've made it to this blog, then you've found me! I post affirmations all over the place. Reach out. I'd be happy to write some just for you, if this is an area where you are lost. Affirmations are a simple way to rewire your brain and begin to rewrite the story you're telling yourself. After all, the words that you use to describe your life are how it manifests. Start telling yourself a beautiful story. Since we're doing Self-Care September, all the affirmations this month on my newsletter and Instagram have to do with self-care.
So, this, and every month, take time to prioritize yourself. These are the basics. Start by incorporating 1 or 2 at a time, if these seem stressful. Self-care should NEVER seem stressful or feel heavy. It should always be you, creating space to just be you, right where you are, no judgement, and to love yourself there. As always, I love you. Go love you, too.
Until next time, I believe in you.
- Mer
